In this
post I would like to summarize the first semester of this academic year but not
only in terms of studying. Since I started writing my blog from the stories of
my dreams, in this summary I would also refer to one of my dreams from the
past.
In the beginning
I should mention that it is my first year in Adam
Mickiewicz University
in Poznań. Previously
I studied in Cracow
where I had a lot of friends and where I was close to my hometown. Then I
decided to enroll to the University of
Poznań and I left Cracow. I moved to the new city where I didn’t know anybody, any
places etc. All my friends, my family and my boyfriend left in Cracow and Bielsko. Now I’m living in a room
the walls of which are painted grey. I like this colour but in combination with
the greyness of this year’s autumn and winter it had a negative impact on my
mood. The last four months were very hard for me. I had to acclimatize myself
to the new reality, new city,
new people and first of all to the new university. New subjects and exams
proved to be more difficult than ones I had before. And the worse thing was the
loneliness, the feeling of longing for my home, friends and of course for my
boyfriend who I saw rarely because of the distance. The image of this time reminds
me of one of my dreams I had some years before:
"I was alone
in the world. The world was an extremely long and wide empty hall with all the
walls painted grey, without doors and windows, furniture, equipment, flora and
fauna. It has very overwhelming atmosphere. I was walking in that greyness
looking for any sign of life and after long time I saw a slight sun beam coming
to my world through the window as small as a notebook. There was an old wooden chair
and a book on it. I sat on the chair and opened the book. It was an album with photos
of my family and my friends. When I saw them I told: You all were always close
to me and now I’m alone in this sad world."
It was very
depressing dream. During these four months there were some moments in which I
felt just like in that dream and that’s why I remembered about it.
Now the new
semester started and I hope it will be better. Every day I see more and more
sun through my window pane and I hope the spring will come soon. The thing
which now gives me the will to live and makes me feel happy is the fact that my
boyfriend moved to Poznań and we can see each other everyday!